Gotta Have TV part 4

Mother was nervous, but not near as much as she normally would have been after these kinds of things. By that I mean she didn’t trust strangers. Being handicapped makes one easy targets. And I guess the one thing that was predominate in my childhood was the fact that I always felt the need to look out after my mother. People always laughed at her and made fun of her behind her back. There was always those who thought because she couldn’t hear, it meant she couldn’t see either so they often tried to steal from her. Having my vision back made it possible for me to look out for her again.

After the exam by my neurologist, he became excited and edgy. He went on to explain that the exam as well as the x rays that had just been taken showed none of the damage to my brain that had been recorded right after the accident. He had no explanation. My mother looked very concerned. So much so it worried me. At that moment I became very nervous and I felt as if mom and I should leave straight away. We left the doctors and on the way back to the hospital I was having this urgent feeling that we had to go somewhere. I didn’t know where we were going but I knew how to get there and I guided my mother who was driving accordingly. She was getting scared because my emotional state was becoming more excited. She had no clue what had come over me. I didn’t either but I knew it was out of my control. But I also felt we were going to be okay.

We wound up at a public library in a small town between Dallas and our destination. I grabbed the steering wheel from my mom as we were driving along the road and made her turn into the grass that was in front of this library. I jumped out of the car and ran into the building and to the back of the library. On a table opened and printed side down was a book by Billy Graham. On the page that was open, it described that had I looked up I would have seen that Angel when he left the fast food place.

Obviously this incident profoundly affected me. It affected everyone in my life at the time.

Some people have left, never wanting anything to do with me again. As a matter of fact none of the people that were in my life at that time are in my life today.

I ran from that calling. In part because when I counseled about it I got a lot of resentment from clergy who were quick to tell me that didn’t happen. I sensed envy on their behalf. I struggled with it for a number of years and finally a man who has a metaphysical church in north Texas finally heard me out and helped me come to some terms with the event. Or more to the point, the aftermath of the event.